Atlanta LPC Counseling Services, LLC

Mindfulness Tonight, we watched a movie in our neighborhood green. At one point, I leaned toward my son, newly six, and told him the mosquitoes were getting me. He told me, The clue is to not pay attention to them.... Well, he was right, of course. He knows that we can choose where we focus our attention. I followed his suggestion and chose to sing along with the soundtrack of the movie instead. The mosquito bites were still there, and they were less bothersome. I tended to them when we returned home after the movie. I appreciate that mindfulness can help us turn suffering into pain by helping us to momentarily distract so that we can enjoy an unusual and needed outing during our continued shelter in place. *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #dbtmindfulnesspractice #mindfulnesspractice See more

Dialectics: This was Dexter. He was eleven years old when he died suddenly on Sunday. We were sitting beside each other on the couch (a rare occurrence with him) when he made a few screams and then fell over. I miss Dexter I got him from my mother when he was a kitten. At that time, he terrorized my other two cats and caused one to live under the bed. I eventually gave him to a neighbor, who had no other pets at the time with the promise that I’d take him back when my ca...ts died. Dexter was always an escape artist, even leaping off a second story balcony to find his freedom. Nearly three years ago, Dexter returned to me with some new habitsbiting and scratching at random times. He would come to sit on us, and we’d believe that he wanted some loving, so we’d pet him, and we’d be viciously attacked. The entire family walked on eggshells around him, especially since he would also swipe at us when we walked by him. Also, he continued his great escapes and sit, unmoving, in the middle of traffic. So, he died, as I mentioned, in a completely surprising and surreal episode. I feel sad, and I feel relieved. I also feel guilty that I didn’t like him more than I did. I loved him, and I didn’t like him, even though I wanted to. He was difficult to live with, as everyone in my family can attest, and he had moments of sweetness. He was also incredibly beautiful and HUGE, weighing over 20 pounds. I miss his big furry body sleeping on our chairs, and I miss him attempting to make his escape. I miss his beautiful voice and his clear blue eyes. I miss those moments when he climbed up on the couch to hold me down with his bulk. Dexter reminded me that dialectics abound around us. They’re everywhere. They’re in our relationships, in our losses, and in our gains. We’ll probably always remember Dexter, and the parts of him that drove us crazy will become fond memories. Good-bye Dexter. I loved you. *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #dbtdialectics See more

Many of us have heard of ACES or Adverse Childhood Experiences and know that if we have a high ACES score, we can be pretty sure that we are struggling in adulthood. Well, recent studies are showing that PCES or Positive Childhood Experiences can counteract ACES. I have known for a long time about the notion of resilience and how it can help a child overcome adversity during childhood. This article has more to say about that with regards to specific ways that resilience can happen.

Pleasant Events The other night, a couple of friends and I got together on Facebook to play a board game. Prior to the pandemic, we met every Monday to play board games, and we’ve been missing this. So, we decided to figure out a way to play online.... There are a variety of ways to do this. We played a card-based game where one of us drew cards that determined our play. I have attached an article here for you to read about this as a way to play games with friends. https://link.medium.com/4MKit1Vrg8. The website Boardgame Arena is mentioned in the article, and it’s a website that my friends and I have used in the past. It’s a great way to play both familiar and unfamiliar games. *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. Also, I have written a blog post on this subject. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #emotionregulation #emotionregulationskills #dbtemotionregulation #pleasantevents See more

I don’t know about you, COVID-19 has lasted longer than I expected it to. And, I’m tired. I can’t tell you how many posts I’ve read on social media recently about people hitting walls with the emotional side of the pandemic. Additionally, there are so many people I have spoken to who want to know what else they can do because the skills aren’t working.... That certainly may feel like reality, and it remains necessary to engage in skills. What I’m talking about here are Emotion Regulation skills. Many people are at the end of their ropesmy five-year-old told me last weekend that he believes we need a vacationand probably have the urge to avoid, or to use Distress Tolerance skills. I get it. I find myself there sometimes, too. The thing about DT skills is that they are meant for distress that is relatively short in durationthey aren’t meant to be life skills. That’s why we need to focus on ER skills. Marsha Linehan provides a list of 225 pleasant events that people can try out. Lane Pederson also has an extensive list. Although, you probably don’t need these. What you do needprobablyis to schedule at least one activity every day that you enjoy, something that you can look forward to each day. And, engage in it mindfullypractice your Participate skill. Remember that the goal of emotion regulation is to decrease your vulnerability to negative emotions and increase your vulnerability to positive ones. During a time like a pandemic, this may not feel like much. And, it’s everything. *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #emotionregulation #emotionregulationskills #dbtemotionregulation #dbtemotionregulationskills See more

I just put these up on my freezer for use in our family’s homeschool. Looking at them this way caused me to think about how our thoughts can be all jumbled up in our heads with different words jumping out at us. This makes me so grateful for a regular mindfulness practice. ... When we practice mindfulness daily, we build up the skills necessary for choosing our focus. This can be really helpful during stressful times. When we take time out of our dayand research shows that we need only five minutes per dayto do this, we increase the likelihood that we can choose our focus during stressful times. That seems more than reasonable, right? How can you find ways to take that five minutes for mindfulness each day? If you would like to see my Dialectical Strategies for Practicing Mindfulness, please go to my web site, the link is in my bio! *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. Also, I have written a blog post on this subject. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #dbtmindfulnesspractice #mindfulnesspractice #wisemind #dbtwisemind See more

I’m so excited that this game arrived yesterday! I backed it on Kickstarter because it’s a game based on using DBT skills. I haven’t had a chance to play it yet, and I’m excited about playing with my family in preparation for then playing with my clients. I’ll keep you updated on how it goes.... #dbtrocks #dbtskills #dbtdialectics #dbtmindfulnesspractice #dbtinterpersonaleffectivenessskills #dbtdistresstolerance #dbtemotionregulation #dbtgame #thegameofreallife See more

Vulnerability to Positive Emotions Lately, I’ve been hearing how heavy people are feeling. I’m feeling it, too. I’ve been talking to my clients about the importance of Increasing Vulnerability to Positive Emotions or building resilience to negative ones.... One way to do this is to plan regular joyful events. Do something every day, or as often as possible, that brings a feeling of joy or happiness. The nice thing is that this can include just about anything, unless it will ultimately be harmful in any way. Both Marsha Linehan and Lane Pederson have lists of hundreds of positive events in their respective DBT skills books. Something to think about is that currently, it may feel like WORK to engage in positive or pleasant events, and it’s really important that we do so now when there’s so much going on that’s stress-inducing and, if we’re not intentional, will contribute to our having an increased vulnerability to negative emotions, if we’re not already there. Some things that we’re doing over here: 1. Dancing to our favorite songs 2. Singing 3. Trying out new recipes 4. Growing a small garden 5. Telling new made-up stories 6. Going on neighborhood adventures 7. Learning how to skateboard 8. Taking epsom salt baths 9. Playing piano and guitar Sometimes, I find that I’m just tired. We also need to listen to our bodies. Rest when we need rest, cry when we need to cry. We want to find synthesis. We don’t want to rest all the time, and we don’t want to spend so much time trying to have fun that we wear ourselves out. You know your body better than anyone else. It’s really important that you listen to it, engage in positive events daily, and get adequate rest when that’s what your body wants. Tonight, I made a new restful essential oil blend. I think it’s working! *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #emotionregulation #emotionregulationskills #dbtemotionregulation #dbtemotionregulationskills #therapy #counseling See more

Action vs. Inaction Tonight, I overheard a discussion between family members. Two were asking my son why he had taken a communal bowl of guacamole from in front of his sister’s seat at the table. They asked him repeatedly, questions like, Why did you do it? and How would you feel if someone did that to you? He said nothing.... This was surprising to me, because he is pretty impulsive and says what’s on his mind, especially when he perceives a wrong being done, especially to him. They informed him that saying nothing wouldn’t help him. Then, they took the bowl away. I talked to him about it a short while later, asking why he hadn’t answered. He informed me that he knew that anything he said would cause more trouble for him. One thing that I tell my clients when we’re talking about the Model for Describing Emotionsand discussing action urges vs. actions, in particularis that inaction is also an action. It sends a message. Sometimes, it saves us from making a situation worse than it already is. Although he was told that his lack of response wasn’t helping him, we also know that it didn’t hurt. Whereas, he has learned in the past that trying to speak up when he’s feeling vulnerable in certain circumstances only causes more trouble for him. When they took the bowl away, he ran out of the room. He said to me later, I don’t know why she was so upset about the bowlit was empty! Who wants an empty bowl, right? *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #dbtinterpersonaleffectiveness #dbtinterpersonaleffectivenessskills #interpersonleffectiveness #interpersonaleffectivenessskills #modelfordescribingemotions #actionurgeisseparatefromaction See more

Mindfulness Practice I received this birthday present yesterday. It’s a picture of one of my favorite placesthe Sydney Opera House, which I was able to visit in the summer of 1994. It’s also one of my favorite art techniques, although it’s so much easier to do now than when I was a kid in grade school art class, coloring hard on a white paper first with bright colors and then with black. We rubbed some crayons away with that project! Then, we drew pictures in the black... to reveal the bright colors underneath. This one is all ready for me; I just have to scratch on the picture that’s there to create the beautiful picture lying within the colors. It also came with implements to scratch with. While working this picture, I am focusing on my breathing as well as the minute details in the fireworks (peaking out of the left hand corner). Right now, between what’s going on in the world and other stressors, I’m feeling pretty worn out. This picture came just in time! I think it will take me a while to complete, and I look forward to the mindfulness practice to help me be in the moment, rather than engaged in worry thoughts about the past and future. What kinds of projects do you engage in mindfully to help you stay in the moment during overwhelmingly emotional times? *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #dbtmindfulnesspractice #mindfulnesspractice #wisemind #dbtwisemind See more

I wrote an Open Letter on my blog to someone struggling with Black Lives Matter vs. All/Blue Lives Matter. In DBT, we strive to find the synthesis between dialectics. My hope is that we can find some synthesis during this time so we can reach some real change. I invite you to read it.... https://atlantagatherapy.com/blog/ *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #dbtdialectics See more

Here is a blog post I wrote in response to Black Lives Matter vs. All/Blue Lives Matter. https://atlantagatherapy.com/2020/06/15/open-letter/

Pre-existing Vulnerability Factors We all have them. Whether we are aware of it, or not, we enter every interaction with others carrying these vulnerability factors. These can include whether we’ve gotten enough sleep, or we’re hungry, or we’ve been sheltering in place for a long time. ... Pre-existing vulnerability factors can also include our biases pertaining to race, gender, sexual identity, etc. If we are walking around with biases about these and other important social issues, we can find ourselves experiencing different emotions and action urges that complicate our interpersonal interactions. This can have interpersonal consequences, and also social and global consequences. June is gay Pride month to commemorate the Stonewall riots in 1969. Juneteenth, a day to commemorate Texas enacting the Emancipation Proclamation, is approaching in the midst of continued protests for the important cause of Black Lives Matter and racial inequality. It could be said that this is a very good time to look at our pre-existing vulnerability factors around these issues. Doing so can increase pain for the short-term and can decrease pain and suffering in the longterm. Pre-existing vulnerability factors tend, more often than not, to contribute to emotional pain. There’s something we can do to alleviate that pain by becoming aware of those factors or biases and healing them to the best of our ability. There are resources to help us do this if we need them. *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #emotionregulation #emotionregulationskills #dbtemotionregulation #dbtemotionregulationskills #preexistingvulnerabilityfactors See more

This picture is of my son and me earlier today... sort of. He created some penguin feet for us out of masking tape so we could explore the neighborhood from a penguin’s perspective (thanks Wild Kratts). As we were talking about how effective these feet were for various aspects of our exploration, I got to thinking about our interpretations and beliefs about prompting events.... Sometimes, our beliefs about prompting events contribute to our feelings of emotional pain. How often do we challenge our beliefs? Probably not often enough. Recently, I’ve seen a lot of videos featuring people saying and doing mean things. I’ve also read and heard a lot of mean and ineffective things. What would happen if we look at the beliefs that lead to the urge to engage in mean-spirited behaviors and to say mean things to others? My first thought is that there would be a lot of pain. And, aren’t the above-mentioned behaviors painful? Some of these behaviors are leading to job loss. Is that not painful? I think we’re already in a lot of pain. Because what affects one of us affects us all. We cannot avoid being in pain right now. What would it be like to tape on some penguin feet and go out in the rain? Uncomfortable, obvious (my feet are still feeling it). Jump in puddles, climb on muddy slopes down to creeks, and get our penguin perspective on things. We learned some things about penguin feet that are effective today, and we realized maybe why penguins don’t live in Georgia. What could we learn about our beliefs that could help us to make positive change for ourselves and others? *This is a simplified description of this skill. If you'd like to learn more about this skill or how I may be able to help you, please contact me. To visit my website, please check my bio! #dbtrocks #dbtskills #emotionregulation #emotionregulationskills #dbtemotionregulation #dbtemotionregulationskills #modelfordescribingemotions See more