Atlanta Parenting Therapy

When we leave the parent decision up to the toddler, things tend to get a little messy. Sure, it may distract from or avoid a tantrum on occasion, but in the grand scheme, it creates confusion around who gets to decide what. On the flip side, taking age-appropriate toddler decisions and making them into parent decisions 100% of the time can leave your toddler feeling even more out of control and powerless. Discerning what is an appropriate decision for the parent or for ...the toddler is a great first step in beginning to reign in the power struggles and get clear with your boundaries. First, we need to identify the big umbrella decisions that are intended to be made by the parent. And within each of those umbrellas, we can often find 5-100 smaller, age-appropriate, toddler decisions. My encouragement to you today is to begin asking yourself is this a parent decision or a child decision?. If it is a parent decision, I want you to make it and hold it with confidence and consistency. If it is a good area for a child's decision to be practiced, I want you to offer the two choices and let your child own that decision. If discerning the difference feels confusing and battle-filled, then lets chat and talk about how you can begin to navigate these decisions. Your child will thrive and flourish in their own age-appropriate decisions as they learn that their parent is able to confidently make the parent decisions. You’ve got this! #atlantatherapist #therapyformoms #parentingsupport #momlife #atlantamoms #parentingtherapy #parenting #motherhood #mama #mom #terribletwos #toddlers #mindfulness #mentalhealth #atlantaparents #intentionalparenting #connectedparenting #youmatter #respectfulparenting #raisinglittles

Are we really ever on the same page 100% of the time? Probably not. But if the description of parent 1 & parent 2 sounds even remotely relevant to the way your parenting team function, then chances are you are both experiencing a lot of stress, chaos, overwhelm, and even guilt when it comes to parenting. While both of these parenting descriptions have elements of truth to them and both have important and valuable pieces, the contrast of the two can be felt deeply. When o...ne parent wants to say yes to everything and the other wants to say no to everything, it creates a divide in the family system. So how do we get on the same page so that we can create an environment of consistency in our home? -Start by recognizing the differences; this is best done through a positive lens. Recognize the ways that your partner holds boundaries well, or is intentional about slowing down and connecting with the kids. Highlight the differences in each of your approaches to parenting, and begin to have conversations about what it might look like to find a balance that allows each of you to be consistent and aligned. -Hold space for your history; often times when we fall into one of these parent descriptions, there is a history that comes with it. It may be the way our own parents raised us or what we observed in others. It is important to hold space and process these pieces so that we can move forward in growth. -Identify similarities, non-negotiables, and hopes/expectations; spend an evening (maybe just an hour) talking through the areas of parenting that you want to focus on for getting on the same page *& with all of this, remember the importance of supporting one another, building each other up, and finding the things to celebrate in the process. If these conversations feel overwhelming or often result in conflict or disconnect, then parenting therapy may be the perfect fit for you. I help parents navigate these differences and come to understand their best parenting selves as a team. Send me a DM to talk more!

Check out this webinar with my friend Dr. Carolina of The Wellness Connection! Click on the video and drop your name/email in the comments to be entered into the giveaway! Talking about toddlers and this season of parenting is such a fun and joyful thing. I am grateful for Dr. Carolina and our aligned missions to bring support and wellness to the families in our city. **Enter the give away!! just comment your name/email and you will be entered to win! tag a friend who may benefit from this information!

Wrapping up this week's topic of parental preference! Here are 6 tips for managing, getting through, and growing through a parental preference phase with your toddler: 1Be consistent! Follow through on what was decided in a consistent way 2Stay calm. (this one often feels the hardest because truthfully, it is just a bath and why on earth does this 3-year-old feel such strong emotion about who sits next to the tub?!) But nonetheless, take a deep breath, and remember the po...wer of staying calm. 3Confidence! Yes, sometimes its a fake it till we make it kinda confidence, but little ones pick up on our hesitation and uncertainty. State your boundary with confidence. 4Don’t take it personally. Easier said than done, but it is important to remind yourself that the heart of the matter is not about dislike for a parent, but rather a developmentally appropriate push for control. 5Support one another! If parental preference is present, it almost always means that there are two parents present in the home. It is important to support one another. This means if little one is demanding that dad do bath time, it is important that dad supports the boundary by not stepping in and taking over. Sure, it feel easier to just end the battle by saying whatever, I'll do it, but then we need to go back to tips 1 & 3. 6Give appropriate choices that bring about a yes. If the example is bathtime, then once the boundary is stated around WHO is doing bath time, shift to what the little one CAN decide. What bath towel? What toy to bring in? Bubble or no bubbles? This helps our littles feel in control of something. Hopefully this week's focus on parental preference has felt helpful and ahs brought about good conversation in your parentins team. If you have any additional questions about the topic, send me a message or drop a comment below. I would love to answer them! #atlantatherapist #therapyformoms #parentingsupport #atlantamoms #parentingtherapy #parenting #motherhood #mama #mom #toddlers #mindfulness #mentalhealth #atlantaparents #intentionalparenting #connectedparenting #youmatter #respectfulparenting #raisinglittles

We have talked about what parental preference looks like and sounds like and feels like (see previous post), but what on earth do we SAY when we get the constant NO, not YOU, I want mom/dad!!! As with all things we discuss on this page, we want to hold the boundary. Once it has been decided and stated that mom is doing bath time, or dad is doing bedtime, it is important that we follow through and stick with the plan. Which means, cue the tantrum/meltdown/pushback. This is w...here the parental preference surfaces. But we hold the boundary. We say yep, I hear you, I hear that you want mom; and dad is doing bath time tonight. We are CALM, KIND, & CONFIDENT on the outside. Yes, we may feel frustrated, annoyed, and maybe even hurt by this exchange. And we want to hold the boundary. By holding the boundary, we are communicating that we can handle the big emotions that they have, and that we are able to be the confident leader they need in that moment. Read through the examples in the picture above, and comment/message me with questions you have. This is a challenging topic and behavior, and I want you to know that you are not alone. On Friday, I will give six quick tips around parental preference. Follow along for more and share with a friend! --- Are you looking to gain confidence in this season of parenting? Wanting to shift from control to connection? Parenting Therapy available for families in the state of Georgia and Florida Reach out today through the link in the bio to schedule a free phone-consultation today! #atlantatherapist #therapyformoms #parentingsupport #atlantamoms #parentingtherapy #parenting #motherhood #mama #mom #toddlers #mindfulness #mentalhealth #atlantaparents #intentionalparenting #connectedparenting #youmatter #respectfulparenting #raisinglittles