Atlanta Center for Self-Compassion

Love this poem. It's an old favorite. I read it during meditation today and was struck by how deep the striving to be good runs in me. It can be exhausting. Today I am setting an intention to let my body love what it loves. You do not have to be good. You do not have to walk on your knees for a hundred miles through the desert, repenting. You only have to let the soft animal of your body love what it loves.... Tell me about despair, yours, and I will tell you mine. Meanwhile the world goes on. Meanwhile the sun and the clear pebbles of the rain are moving across the landscapes, over the prairies and the deep trees, the mountains and the rivers. Meanwhile the wild geese, high in the clean blue air, are heading home again. Whoever you are, no matter how lonely, the world offers itself to your imagination, calls to you like the wild geese, harsh and exciting over and over announcing your place in the family of things. Mary Oliver #bodywisdom #mindfulselfcompassion #bodylove #babystepsandgentleness #wildgeese #maryoliver

We need to support each other in creating space where can be in the present moment and listen. Once we can listen deeply to the truth coming from our experience, our pain, and our body as well as the experience, pain, and bodies of others, then we are so much more powerful. We are embodied. We can tolerate suffering; we can get free from the personal and historical shame that has a hold on us in so many ways. In the past I was following rules coming from some external authori...ty. The rules coming from my childhood were "Don't talk about your painful feelings. Be positive, helpful, and high achieving". The rules from my evangelical Christianity were "heavenly salivation is more important than love, truth, and justice here on earth". The rules coming from my liberalism were "don't ever let your internalized racism show". (I have to let my internalized racism show if I want to heal from it and root it out) All of these different rules invalidated parts of me that were true. We all grew up in family systems and historical systems that caused us pain and yet we were taught over and over again that the suffering we were experiencing was just in our minds - and expressing it made us weak, a crybaby, too much, and too sensitive. The truth is not inside these external rules; the truth is inside our suffering. Unless we can feel it and validate it and learn from it, we are only perpetuating it. For ourselves and for us all. - Diane I am holding space for listening to ourselves every Tuesday at 12 on Zoom. Link in bio #listeningtoourselves #babystepsandgentleness #meditation #selfhealing #womensgrowthandhealing #tybeeisland #savannahtherapist #atlantatherapist #bodywisdom #embodiment #wisdominsuffering #mindfulselfcompassion #tuesdaymeditation #atlantaselfcompassion #savannahselfcompassion

Fierce Self-Compassion

I have been enjoying being more in tune with the phases of the moon since being in Tybee. The fact that the moon cycles through all its phases each month feels like a good ongoing reminder of #babystepsandgentleness. When I’m in a hard moment, I can remind myself that it won’t last forever; things are always shifting. Instead of setting New Year’s resolutions which feel overwhelming (and we let go of by Jan 5), I love the idea that each new month gives us a fresh start to beg...in again. Here are some photos of the full moon over Tybee from June - September. My focus for October is getting settled into new family routines in our new space. That will come with moments of waning energy and moments of waxing energy, just like the moon. I’m grateful that there is no rush to get it all done immediately. Life unfolds in phases. #lifeunfoldsinphases #fullmoon #waxingandwaning #atlantatherapy #savannahtherapy #mindfulselfcompassion #tuningin

We are closing on our house in Tybee today. Here's to new adventures! #babystepsandgentleness #movingtotybee #newbeginnings #saltwaterhealseverything

Yesterday I could feel the inner critic creeping on me all day. I would like to say I noticed it with curiosity and compassion but honestly I was judging myself for feeling anxious. In hindsight I can see that I was feeling a bit frenzied, desperate for relief from the anxiety and self-criticism. I was trying to fix it by cleaning the house, snapping at others about cleaning, and checking things off the list all my long-standing, well-worn strategies. 1. Have a painful fee...ling 2. Judge myself 3. Get things accomplished to try to fix the feeling. In a way these strategies worked to help me survive painful feelings for years. In another way, these strategies left me feeling miserable and alone. The Tuesday mediation was a real blessing to me yesterday and helped change the course of my day. Despite technology issues, I was able to tune in enough to validate myself and notice more of what was going on with my feelings. We close on the new house tomorrow (10/1) and some business transitions are going into effect this week as well. It is a lot of change, a lot of uncertainty, a lot of financial pressure. Ohhhhhhhhhh, of course I’m feeling anxious! After that I was able to turn towards myself with kindness. I was still flailing but I leaned on some of my more compassionate coping strategies. So here is my second round of coping strategies from yesterday. 1. I noticed my feelings with curiosity and compassion and validated them 2. I slowed down for a bit to ask myself what I really needed and 3. I focused on taking care of myself. I took a walk, got in the water, and decided I needed some encouragement. I reached out to one person for encouragement and wasn’t able to get it so I tried again and again. Third time was a charm and the encouraging words really helped lift my spirits! It helped that I knew what I needed and I asked for it specifically, not demanding but requesting, until I got it. This was all before the debate where the president bullied, gaslighted, and supported white supremacy. Let the coping strategies begin again Posting my morning visit to the water for all of you who are feeling rattled after last night. #babystepsandgentleness #selfkindness

Join us today, and every Tuesday, for a free guided meditation from 12-12:30 on Zoom as we seek to notice the compassion all around us. Link in bio. #babystepsandgentleness #meditation #freeguidedmeditation #mindfulness #selfcompassion #mindfulselfcompassion #selfcare #tunein

We are meditating together today at 12 on Zoom. Holding space for dialectics - fear and hope, suffering and gratitude, care for others and care for ourselves.

It’s easy to get discouraged out here in the wilderness of 2020. There is just one major blow after the next. I keep hearing clients say, But what I’m dealing with is nothing compared to others. This may be true but I don’t always think it’s helpful. Here’s what I propose for our collective coping plan for the rest of 2020. 1. Acknowledge your suffering and try not to compare it to anyone else’s. 2. Treat yourself the way you would treat a friend - kindness is a good pla...ce to start. 3. Stay connected to people who validate your feelings and help you feel seen. 4. Explore ways to stay hopeful even in the midst of dark times. Easier said than done, I know. What helps you hold space for both suffering and gratitude at the same time? 2020 is asking us all to rise to the occasion. We are looking around and finding that we are the grown ups in the room. We need to support ourselves and each other especially during these next few months. As I asked myself how I can contribute to putting good out in the world through the end of 2020, I have decided to focus the Tuesday meditation circle on this dialectic - a space to hold hope and suffering together at the same time. If you need help remembering the sun in the midst of the dark clouds of 2020, join us in our free Tuesday meditations. (Link is pinned at the top of our FB page) This space will remain available through the election and the end of the year. #2020 #meditation #babystepsandgentleness #befriendyourself #griefsupport #selfcompassion #selfkindness #2020election #hope #gratitude #compassion #mindfulselfcompassion #copingwithcovid

I'm always grateful for @emmahillearymusic. She inspires me to be more creative, open-hearted, and bold. She knows my stories and I know hers. She gives me hope for a brighter future. She knows I'm not someone who posts on time for #nationaldaughtersday. #daughters #grateful #gratitude #hopeforthefuture #laughterisgoodforthesoul #girlpower #thefutureisfemale

Meet Astrid. Astrid joined our family serendipitously at the beginning of August. We had just made the hard decision that Emma would not attend classes on campus for her first semester at UGA. We have a husky, Noko, and had adopted a Brittany Beagle mix this summer, Bean. So we weren't in the market for another pet! One night as we got in the car I heard a loud bird and commented on it to Jim. As we were driving I noted that the sound of the bird was staying just as loud and... by the time we got closer to our condo Jim said, "I don't think that's a bird. There must be an animal trapped in the car." I decided to let him figure that out... When Emma heard what was happening she came immediately out prepared with long sleeves and a flashlight. She was the one who spotted this tiny kitten who had found a little perch somewhere up under the car. It was storming that night so Astrid must've tried to hide from the storm on the warm underside of our van. Emma did some research and figured out how to feed this very tiny kitten overnight and we took her to the vet the next morning. Even though we weren't looking to adopt a third pet, Astrid came to find us. She is taking care of Emma while she does her college classes virtually from home. She is adorable, snuggly, and playful but also she likes to bite hands and feet - a lot! She likes to be involved in what you're doing, so if you're typing Astrid will help you out by walking across the keyboard or maybe just sitting on it. If Emma is drawing, Astrid likes to get involved in that work too. She likes to check out what you are eating up close and sleep right next to you on your pillow - or in your hair. I am grateful she showed up during a hard transition to help us find our way through. #rescuecat #rescuecatsofinstagram #kittensofinstagram #kitten #uga #college #welcometothefamily #babystepsandgentleness #gratitude #mindfulselfcompassion #catsofinstagram #catlovers #catstagram #cats_of_instagram #beachcat #tybee #tybeeisland #atlantatherapist #savannahtherapist

#meditation #tunein #innerwisdom #selfcare #freeguidedmeditation #selfcompassion #mindfulness #curiosity #nonjudgement #radicalacceptance #mindfulselfcompassion #fiercevulnerability #fiercekindness #bodyneutrality #bodyacceptance #heartcentered #babystepsandgentleness

May her memory be a revolution. May we persist in the face of obstacles as she did. May we fight for justice as she did. May we each take the next right step to honor our unique purpose here in the world - as she did. #neverthelessshepersisted #persist #goodtrouble #onestepatatime #babystepsandgentleness #mindfulness #meditation #selfcompassion #mindfulselfcompassion